How to Make the Perfect Parent Trap Music for Your Children
We’re often told that the best way to parent is to get parents involved.
So it makes sense that many parents of kids like ours are also parents of parents.
But it can also be hard to figure out how to create a soundscape for your kids, especially when they are so different in age and development.
So how do you keep your children happy while also enjoying their music?
We sat down with Amanda and Arlene Grande, parents of Ben Stiller and Emma and Ben’s sister, Arissa, to find out how they use music to support their kids.
And how do parents get involved in the parenting process?
“It’s a combination of listening to music, listening to other kids’ music and listening to the parents of your kids,” Amanda says.
“There’s a lot of great advice that we’ve seen in parenting classes on how to have a good conversation with your kids about their interests and what they want to do, and also listen to them.”
She also notes that kids love to listen to their parents, so parents need to make sure they don’t feel they’re being unreasonable.
“I think the biggest thing is to listen and have a conversation with the kids and make sure that we’re all listening and that we have a very clear idea of what they’re saying,” she says.
The kids are happy with the conversation, and the parents are happy to listen too, says Amanda.
“It really comes down to the fact that it’s a matter of just having fun and having fun with them,” she adds.
“We want them to have an adventure and a lot more fun than what they are experiencing right now, so it’s all about having that conversation with them, because they’ll love you for it.”
The Grandes also suggest that parents should be mindful of how their music affects the kids, so that they can get the most out of it.
“Parents have to make that decision as well, because it is really important that they’re doing the right thing and not just doing the things that they feel are the most fun,” Arlene adds.
Arlene says that parents have to consider what their kids are enjoying at the moment and how that might influence their own music.
“So for me, I think it’s really important to listen, because I know that Ben and Emma are very much into their music.
So I do listen to my kids and listen to that, but I also listen and think, what do I do with that music that I like?”
Arlene notes that music has a lot to do with happiness, too.
“A lot of people have this idea that music is just a substitute for having fun, and they can do the best they can and they’ll make it as good as they can,” she explains.
“But it’s actually really about having fun.
So you need to listen with your child and you need music to be that substitute.
It’s really about the music, not just about the fun, the happiness.”
The parents have their own theories about what music should be.
Arlan says that he would listen to his children’s music as much as possible to be a parent.
“Music is so important for me to do my job,” he says.
“[It’s] about letting my kids know that they are loved, and that they have an identity that’s worth being in.
I listen to music because I want them [to] know that I love them, and it’s the same for me as I’m with my kids.”
Amanda says that she loves listening to her children’s musical talents and she enjoys having her own ideas about what songs should be in the child’s repertoire.
“What I like to do is listen to a bunch of different music that have an emotional connection with me,” she shares.
“Like, I’ve got a song called ‘The World’s Gone to Hell’ by David Bowie.
I love that song, I love David Bowie, I want to hear that.
“My kids are into that, so I’ve really listened to that one as well.” “
And then the last one is called ‘Museums’, and I listen a lot,” she continues.
“My kids are into that, so I’ve really listened to that one as well.”
Arlene, too, enjoys listening to their music, and she says that her husband’s favourite song is one by a band called The Roots, which she describes as “very romantic, so beautiful, so catchy, and kind of a classic rock song.”
“My husband and I really enjoy listening to our own music, too,” she notes.
“As parents, we have this wonderful opportunity to listen all the time, so we really have the chance to do something that we love and to have fun, to listen as much, as much of our own work as possible.”
When you do listen, however, there are some things you may need to consider.